ON THE ROCKS
It was never a dream to write words for a whisky bottle, and yet here I am having achieved that exact dream.
This was a promotion for The Glenlivet where you'd get $10 in free crypto with every bottle of their 12-year-old single malt. Yeah, it came out after crypto crashed earlier this year, but what a time to buy the dip!
Also you might be thinking "Jarrett, why not buy the bottle and take it home for better pictures?" and the answer is I don't drink whisky and wanted to save $80 alright?
you're too far away.
our faces find warmth
in your cold blue light,
that hue of hope
a lighthouse for the lonely.
take us to where we want to be,
to saccharine-soaked realities.
swipe, swipe, swipe,
no, that's not the one.
swipe, swipe, swipe,
anxious thumbs on the run.
the pretty girl,
with the pretty smile,
she knows who can save us,
and while it ain't the lord jesus,
she says she'll still please us.
so click link in bio,
and have CASSIESAVEU20
on your next online purchase.
THE CUPCAKE TREND?
This was the first radio spot I ever wrote. I was in school and just got my first copywriting gig, and we had a client that couldn't use their name anymore and needed a radio spot to tell the city about it. My boss later submitted it for a local advertising award and it beat three spots from the city's football team. Knowing I'm better than the Winnipeg Blue Bombers is awesome.
I live in a pirate-themed suburb called Island Lakes. I wrote a poster campaign promoting it. I don't know why.
There’s always stuff in my house I need to sell. Is this copy overkill? Sure. But life’s boring 90% of the time.
In 2008 I had a college assignment where we had to try and get a letter to the editor published so I picked the most circulated newspaper in Canada. It worked, but at what cost.
TO A DUDE
When I was eight I wrote a letter to Santa. Now, several years later, I’m including it in my professional portfolio.
One of the first pieces of copy I wrote. I got the idea after I bought my first (and last) newish car. The guy who sold it to me said he was a golf pro in South Korea when he wasn’t selling cars but he was probably lying.
I recorded a four-song EP so I could graduate from college. Do I remember how I did any of this? No. But a classmate played the last song at her wedding so that was cool.